The Ultimate New Year’s Gift: Self-Love

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New Year’s is the time of year for reflection and for making life changing decisions that bring about improvements in your life.

 

Many of us spend the first day of the year living in regrets for things not done and focusing on unfulfilled dreams.  Dwelling on the past is likely to cause you to feel powerless and judgmental about yourself.  More importantly, dwelling on mistakes of the past deprives you of focusing on the golden opportunities of the present.

 

This year, vow to give yourself the ultimate gift – self-love.  Self-love is not about narcissism, vanity, and ignoring the needs of others.  Self-love is about being kind, respectful, and forgiving of yourself.

 

Where do you start? Grab a pen and tablet!  Doing the following four very simple exercises will help you to start your New Year in a wonderful, healthy self-loving way:

 

  1. Make a list of everything for which you are thankful.  Gratitude opens the soul to acknowledging the many blessings you already have.  This is not just the “big stuff,” like getting a promotion.  It also includes the basics we take for granted, like having food, water, and a warm place to call home.  We tend to forget how many people in the world do not even have the basics to survive in life.

 

  1. Write down 10 of the biggest “mistakes” you think you have made over the past year.  Take a deep breath, close your eyes, and one-by-one, forgive yourself.  Honestly, it is as simple as saying, “I did the best I could with what I knew at the time – I forgive myself NOW.”  This is perhaps the most healing thing we can ever do for ourselves because we free ourselves to move into present time, where all new possibilities exist!

 

  1. Write down at least 10 major lessons you learned from the “10 biggest mistakes” (item 2) –  Success is so much more than the absence of failure.  It is about learning and growing from every experience we have – both “good” and “bad.”

 

  1. Write down 10 things you choose to accomplish this year.  Be sure to begin each statement with “I am (the ultimate words of creation), state it in the positive, and say it as though it already is accomplished, i.e. “I am increasingly treating myself with love and respect, and I am attracting people who love and respect me in all my relationships.”

 

It is never too late to bring in the change that you have always wanted to see around you. Let this New Year be the one that will see you being at the forefront of introducing new ideas and new concepts to make the world a better and safer place.

 

Happy, Healthy New Year!

 

Sandra

 

 

Sandra Brossman is the author of The Power of Oneness, Live the Life You Choose and the featured presenter in Live the Life You Choose DVD.  To learn more about how you can align your life with spiritual truth, order the book or DVD box set at  http://www.thepowerofoneness.com/products/

 

Getting Unstuck

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We have all had times in our lives when we have felt “stuck.”  What an uncomfortable feeling!  It is like being sucked into a dark emotional whirlpool of indecision and total lack of direction!  When this happens, we go round and round until we actually begin to believe that we are living a life with few or no options.

 

The state of occasionally feeling stuck is part of our spiritual growth and generally follows major shifts in our lives.  It often follows a period of trauma, such as: getting divorced, losing a loved one, a health crisis, or financial loss. Interestingly, it is equally common to experience this feeling following “positive” changes in our lives, such as: getting married, the birth of a child, sending the last child off to school, getting a promotion at work, moving our home location, or retiring.   

 

Often times we deal with the aftermath of going through these traumas and major transitions by “freezing,” which is actually the equivalent of an emotional aftershock.  As always, we need to respect ourselves by honoring and expressing the feelings we have that accompany the shifts within our lives.  We need to be aware of and express grief, anger, resentment, fear, and the myriad of emotions that each experience brings out within us.  Also, this period of emotional plateauing is healthy in that we may require some time to stabilize ourselves in order to prepare for shifting into the new priorities that follow major life changes. 

 

A problem arises only when we remain in this “frozen state” for long periods of time by continuing to focus on the past. Continuing to resist the changes in our lives, whether positive or negative, can cause a great deal of suffering and, over a prolonged period of time, can eventually cause depression.  Depression causes a paralytic state of mind that blocks our creativity and ability to flow with change.  

 

There is an underlying theme beneath the feeling of being stuck:  When we experience major change in our lives, we tend to pause and question our purpose.  In other words, as we end one stage of life and begin another, we are called upon to create new ideas of what we want to do with our lives.  Major life transitions are intersections; and, just as we do when approaching a traffic intersection, we need to slow down in order to switch directions.

 

Here are some suggestions for getting unstuck and moving “into the flow:”

 

1. Express Your Feelings – Be aware of your emotions and express them to supportive people in your life. This helps your mind to process the changes you are experiencing with greater ease and helps to keep your heart open.

 

2. Forgive Yourself – Many times we beat ourselves up with the “I should have,” “I wish I had,” and “If only” statements.  Some of the life shifts you are experiencing can feel like walloping blows to your sense of third dimensional security.  Be kind to yourself by acknowledging that you are doing the best you know to do with what is going on in your life. 

 

3. Develop the Habit of Self-Loving Dialogue – Consciously choose to talk to yourself as though you were your own best friend. By making this a regular practice, you will eventually reinforce your self-esteem.

 

4. Focus on the Lessons Learned Through the Changes – Every experience you have ever had has helped you to become wiser and more whole.  When you glean the life lessons you most need to learn from your challenging experiences,  you will not repeat the same unproductive patterns.

 

5. Express Gratitude for the Lessons – Expressing appreciation for both the ups and downs of life is a wonderful way to attract blessings and to live in a state of grace, no matter what you are experiencing.

 

6. Create a New Dream – The completion of each state of life offers the opportunity for the beginning of a new one. This is the perfect time to decide what you would like to do to expand your life through new adventures. (You may find it helpful to read my previous blog from August 27, “Creating Visions of Your Desired Reality.”) 

 

7. Step Into Your Dream – The most effective way to break out of inertia is to take action.  NOW is the time to take the first step toward fulfilling your visions of new beginnings. You do not have wait until the perfect time, the perfect place, or the perfect opportunity.  There is no “right” or “wrong” when it comes to being the author of your own life.  Every single action that you take toward realizing your new dream creates momentum. As the famous Nike slogan so aptly expresses, “Just Do It!” 

 

The energy of life is dynamic, so change is inevitable.  HOW we experience change is a choice.  When we resist change, we feel stuck; when we accept it, we free ourselves to learn and grow and to experience inner peace, no matter what is going on in our outer world.  

 

Love and Light,

 

Sandra

Creating Visions of Your Desired Reality

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The more we evolve in our personal spiritual healing, the more apparent it is that there is a large gap between our present physical reality and the ideal experience of a world of unity and wholeness.  How, then, do we get from where we are to where we want to be?  How do we stretch out into new realities which we have never seen with our physical eyes?

 

 

We all have dreams tucked away in our hearts of our ideal version of life.  Whether we remember or not, each of us has the extraordinary ability to bring our dreams of a kinder, more enlightened world into our physical reality through the practice of creating visions.  Visions are mental pictures, inspired by the soul, clarifying the quality of life we truly want to experience. While ordinary sight is our ability to see tangible things with our physical eyes, we also have the amazing capacity to see from an infinitely, more expansive perspective–we can see with our mind’s eye (also known as our “third eye”) by imagining something we want to see which is not yet visible in our concrete physical world.

 

 

What is the purpose of creating visions?

 

 

Visions give meaning and purpose to our lives because they are the mental images which guide our actions toward a desired outcome.  Visions originate at a soul level and fuel our passion for living.   In the immortal words of Aristotle, “The soul cannot think without a picture.”  When we truly understand this, it is hard to imagine why we would ever want to live our lives without conscious visions of new realities.  Most of us would not consider building a house without a blueprint of how we want it to look when we are finished–we would not mindlessly start digging out foundations, drilling holes, and nailing up walls without any idea of what we want to create.  Yet, when it comes to the most important structure we can ever build, the context of our lives, we tend to aimlessly react to situations without ever taking the time to envision the ideal of what we want to accomplish.

 

 

How do we know what we want to envision?

 

 

The seeds of our visions are within our dreams.  When we speak of dreams, most of us think of the unconscious messages we receive as we sleep. Our nighttime dreams link our conscious with our subconscious and reveal our innermost thoughts and feelings.  Although nighttime dreams many times appear to make no sense (from a logical point of view), they often provide us with spiritual guidance and insight.  Our dreams are not only revealed in the unconscious messages that are received as we sleep, but also in the conscious desires we constantly carry within our hearts that are begging to be expressed through our actions.  Our daydreams express our aspirations and are many times revealed in the “I’ve always wanted to” statements we find ourselves saying. It is that irrepressible inner drive we have to do something no matter how illogical it may seem – that inner voice that relentlessly speaks to us of things we need to do in order to honor our need to genuinely express our true self.  If we have suppressed our heartfelt desires for a long time, we may think we no longer have any dreams.  The truth is that no matter how long we have squelched dreams of what we want to achieve in our lives, they remain within our hearts until we claim them.

 

 

What are some effective ways in which you can reinforce your visions?

 

 

While dreams are the seeds of all new possibilities, they can only come true if you support them with your actions; and, as always your actions are a choice. Below are a few suggestions for activating your visions:

 

Focus – Since visions are fueled by the soul, focus on the qualities you want to experience in life (such as love, joy, peace, harmony, fulfillment, health); rather than material accumulation.

 

Written and verbal statements – Words have creative power! Develop a habit of talking and writing about what you WANT to see in your life, rather than complaining about how things are.

 

Meditation/Visualization – It is very effective to take 5-10 minutes every day to find a quiet space, close your eyes, and  imagine yourself experiencing a desired situation.  It is particularly effective to imagine how it FEELS to be experiencing what you desire.

 

Prayer –  Ask for divine guidance as to how you can best serve humanity.  This will attract opportunities into your life that align with your talents and interests.

 

Pictures and Drawings – Visions can be literal or metaphoric.  Drawing pictures stimulates the imagination and brings your mental pictures into physical visibility.

 

Gratitude Journal  – Writing in a journal about what you are grateful for opens your heart to receiving the flow of Universal blessings that are already there for you.

 

Physical Enactment  – Pretend that what you are imagining has already come true and that you are acting out the vision.  For example, if you desire to move to a new home, start cleaning out your closets and get organized as though you have already signed the contract to buy a new house.  This sends out a powerful message to the Universe that you believe in your ability to be creative.

 

Be Open to Outcomes – When you consistently hold a vision of living the quality of life you choose, the Universe answers in ways that are for the greatest good of all.  Let go of trying to manipulate how your visions unfold and surrender the outcome to the far more magnificent infinite potential of the Universe.

 

 

Ultimately, we are all here to love and be loved.  Each of us is internally programmed with special gifts and unique ways to bring unconditional love into this third dimensional reality.  Visions make it possible to ignite your dreams sparks by transforming the passive mode of merely wishing for something into the far more dynamic mode of pro-actively co-creating with the Universe.  With practice, you will discover that your visions create a guiding light that magnetizes you to live in the light of spiritual love.

 

 

Love and Light,

 

Sandra

10 Steps for Living a Sacred Life

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Our true life purpose is to live a sacred life by consistently expressing our spiritual values in all that we think, say, and do. 

 

 

 

10 Steps for Living a Sacred Life

 

 

1.   Honor the divinity within yourself, everyone, and everything.

 

Everyone and everything was created in divine love. Accordingly, align your thoughts, words, and deeds with kindness, respect, and cooperation.

 

 

2.   Accept people as they are without trying to change them to conform to your expectations.

 

The only way we can change others is through our own positive example.

 

 

3.   Forgive yourself and others.

 

Be compassionate toward yourself and others – It takes a great deal of courage for any one of us to be here.

 

 

4.   Recognize that we all have the same spiritual purpose – to receive and express unconditional love. 

 

You will remember this in your own unique way and in your own time. So will everyone else.

 

 

5.   Understand that it is not in your greatest good to judge or criticize anyone.

 

Whatever you criticize about someone else is an aspect, to a greater or lesser degree, that you need to heal within yourself.

 

 

6.   See life as a process of growth.

 

There are no failures. Every situation you experience and every person you meet is an opportunity for growth and greater insight to universal truth and love.

 

 

7.   Develop an attitude of gratitude.

 

Being thankful for everything and everyone is the most effective way to create peace and prosperity in your life.

 

 

8.   Remember we are all a part of the whole of existence.  

 

What affects one of us affects all of us. Take responsibility for the fact that your thoughts, words, and actions, and even your underlying motivations, are constantly impacting the entire world.

 

 

9.   Respect everything in the environment.

 

The way we take care of the earth is the way it takes care of us.

 

 

10.  Forgive yourself whenever you forget any of the above.

 

 

 

Excerpt from “The Power of Oneness, Live The Life You Choose”

Cultivating an Attitude of Gratitude

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One of the most wonderful ways we can create peace and abundance in our lives is to focus our attention on gratitude.  Gratitude is a word that we most typically associate with thankfulness.  When we think of thankfulness, many of us focus on the relationships, conditions, and things in our life that we like and enjoy.  Being thankful is a very healthy emotion that helps us to reinforce a positive attitude and maintain balance in life.

 

 

But what about all of the things that go on in our lives that we do not enjoy, like: getting sick, losing our jobs, the death of a loved one, the break-up of a close relationship, being injured in a car accident, making a bad investment, or experiencing violence?  Are we supposed to be thankful for all of these experiences too, or just the “good stuff?”

 

 

This is where the infinitely greater meaning of gratitude comes in.  When we are only thankful for things we like, gratitude is an emotion that is contingent on our situation, therefore it is a conditional emotion.  When things are going well, we are thankful; when life gets tough, we wait until a time when things feel more optimistic before we express thanks again.  The problem with this is that no human being is going to spend life here on earth with only positive experiences. So, if we perceive gratitude in a conditional way, we are quite likely going to have long and frequent periods of time during which we do not feel thankful.

 

 

In the spiritual sense, gratitude is an ongoing attitude in which we choose to be unconditionally appreciative for all that is.  When we think about this, we realize this is a huge concept.  This would mean that we choose to see the blessings in every experience we have, every moment of every day. There is so much pain and suffering in our third dimensional world, as well as a plethora of amazingly challenging, downright unpleasant experiences, so how is it humanly possible to maintain an “attitude of gratitude?”

 

 

Developing an attitude of gratitude begins by choosing to remember that absolutely everything we experience and everyone whom we meet is happening for a reason. Even though many times we do not understand things that occur in our lives, every experience we have is offering us the opportunity to become more whole.  No matter what is going on, we focus on the perfection within what appears to be a lot of imperfection.  Through our thoughts, we call into our life the people and situations that teach us what we most need to know when we most need to learn it. This occurs in both positive and negative ways, depending on how we learn best. For example, if one of our large life lessons is that need to stop giving our power away to others, we will most likely attract controlling personalities into our reality until we figure out how to love ourselves enough to take control of our own life.

 

 

When we function in a state of gratitude, we begin to appreciate everything.  We are not born feeling grateful – it is a frame of mind that needs to be cultivated through practice. We become thankful for the penny we just found on the sidewalk, the parking spot that just opened up at the perfect moment, the smile of a passing stranger, the roof over our heads, and the food we eat.  We begin to see the magnificent wonder of life within everyone and everything.  We are thankful for something as seemingly small as the petal on a flower to the magnitude of the miracle of witnessing a child being born.  We are thankful for a sunny day and equally appreciative for a rainy day.  We express thanks for the unhappy experiences from which we grow, just as much as the happy ones.

 

 

When we practice being thankful for all things great and small, we are aligning our thoughts with the frequency of unconditional love; thus, we open ourselves to welcoming abundance at every level – mentally, emotionally, and physically.  While some days may be a lot more enjoyable than others, practicing an attitude of gratitude is a perfect way to savor every moment of life.

 

 

Love and Light,

 

Sandra

 

Sandra Brossman is the author of The Power of Oneness, Live the Life You Choose.  To learn more about how you can align your life with spiritual truth, order the book at http://www.thepowerofoneness.com/products/