Looking Through the Eyes of Love

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Have you ever had times when every one and every thing is agitating you and you feel like what you most need is a vacation from people in general?

 

On a typical day, we all have an infinite number of opportunities to react to situations that trigger our own fears and insecurities. The driver who suddenly cuts in front of your car may spark you to react with an angry gesture; a work associate who adamantly disagrees with you may cause you to be overtly defensive of your own point of view; being on the receiving end of someone hurling cruel words may cause you to retaliate with a vengeful response; or experiencing a food server with a negative attitude may cause you to respond in an unkind, judgmental manner.

 

When you react to someone else’s fearful words and actions with the same defensive energy, you are perpetuating separation and adding to the negative energy of the situation.  This ultimately results in everyone’s feelings being hurt, as well as a serious breakdown in communication.  When you find yourself in a reactive mode and feeling pulled into other people’s dramas, it is a sure sign that it is time to expand your perspectives to focus on more than just your own personal reality.

 

Perspective is the overall viewpoint from which we see our world. We don’t actually see our perspectives.  We look at life through our perspectives, much the same as we see through a pair of eyeglasses. While we cannot control everything that happens in our lives, each of us is responsible for choosing how we want to interpret and respond to life events and situations.  If we change one letter in the spelling of the word responsible–to responseABLE–we are reminded that we are able to choose our responses to life. Since our responses are based on our perspectives, we are each able to change how we experience life in an instant by changing the lens through which we view our life experiences.  Ultimately, we have a choice:  We can view life from the perspective of fear, which results in mindlessly and defensively reacting to the negative energy of people and situations; or we can learn and grow from every person we meet and every situation we encounter by changing our view of life to see through the eyes of love.

 

Looking through the eyes of love is a conscious choice to perceive people and their situations with compassion and understanding. When you exercise compassion, you are empathetic because you are able to sense the feelings that are motivating another person’s actions, rather than judging their obvious outward behavior. Rather than focusing only on your own personal situation, compassion enables you to see a situation from the other person’s perspective as well. It is through compassion and understanding that you can resonate with another person’s feelings by remembering that, just like you, every single human being you will ever meet is also experiencing pain, sickness, and loss in their lives. You also begin to stop taking people’s reactions so personally – the way someone acts is a projection of how they feel about themselves – not an evaluation of your self-worth.

 

Choosing to perceive life through compassion and understanding, rather than judgment and defensive reaction, opens us up to a whole new vista of life.  It is like looking through a special pair of eyeglasses that enables you to have an emotional x-ray vision that can see the issues of fear that are motivating someone’s negative and offensive behaviors. The person who cuts in front of your car may be going through a divorce; the work associate who relentlessly argues with you may have a serious mental imbalance; the person who is speaking to you with unkind words may have just lost her job; and the restaurant server who had a negative attitude may have just gone through the loss of a loved one.

 

I experienced the value of perceiving a situation in a compassionate way a couple of years ago when I was waiting in the checkout line of a local grocery store. The cashier appeared to be rude as she haphazardly threw the purchased items into bags and never once looked up to smile or greet any of the customers.  I was fourth in line, and the annoyance and judgment of each person who preceded me intensified as the line progressed forward.  When it was my turn to be waited on, I gently asked a simple question:  “Are you having a difficult day?”  The woman who was cashiering looked up and stared at me, her eyes brimming with tears.  “It is more than a difficult day – I am so upset I can hardly breathe. Today marks the one-year anniversary of the day my daughter was killed in a car crash.  She was only 4 years old.  I don’t know how I can even live through today.”  My heart ached for this woman, and I found myself giving her a long, spontaneous hug.  “Thank you for understanding,” she replied. As I left the grocery store, I was so thankful that I had not judged the cashier and had taken an extra minute to ask her that simple question.

 

When we choose to look at people and situations through the eyes of love, we are acknowledging that we are all emotionally vulnerable and that every one of us is  experiencing tremendous challenges in negotiating our spiritual journey here on earth. Not only are we being kind to others, it is also one of the most self-fulfilling ways to honor our own soul.

 

I welcome you to share ways in which you are aware that your perspective has greatly influenced your relationships with others.

 

Love and Light

 

Sandra

 

Welcome 2014! Another Year That Brings Forth Many Opportunities To Reinvent Ourselves

 

This is an image of year 2014 with an arrow pointing down a road toward light - as though we have the whole year ahead of us.

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As we begin yet another new year, we may beat ourselves up for not sticking with the previous year’s resolutions (uh oh – I didn’t keep my resolution to exercise every other day and/or to lose that 50 pounds!). This can lead to a sense of resignation about being able to achieve things in the New Year.

 

Studies consistently indicate that we tend to be extremely self-critical. Psychologist, Rick Hanson, states, “The mind is like Velcro for negative experiences and Teflon for positive ones.” That said, we also know that one of the best ways to motivate ourselves is by focusing on our accomplishments.  Since we tend to measure our successes from the previous year by only the “big things” we have achieved, we overlook the countless “little things” we’ve done that have added a lot of quality to our lives and the lives of others.

 

This is an image of the word negative crossed out and the the words Think Positive displayed

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For this reason, I encourage you to congratulate yourself for the many things you DID accomplish in 2013, like all the times you:

 

  • Were supportive of your child/children when you felt you didn’t have an ounce of patience left to do so
  • Listened attentively to your spouse or partner sharing a problem even when you were experiencing plenty of your own challenges
  • Went to work or finished a major project, giving it your all even though you were exhausted
  • Smiled and said “thank you” to someone who needed to hear it
  • Forgave someone who really hurt your feelings
  • Placed a phone call or sent an email to encourage someone even though you, yourself, were feeling discouraged
  • Offered encouragement to someone in pain even while you were experiencing your own pain
  • Volunteered to take time to help someone in need even though your calendar was jammed
  • Took the time to recycle even though it would have been a lot easier to just throw everything into the trash

 

I could go on and on – but you get the picture!

 

So this year, let’s do something different.  Make it your number one resolution to be kind to yourself and thank yourself for all that you’ve already accomplished.  You were and are amazing!

 

Drop a comment on this post to share what you’d like to thank yourself for today.

 

Love and Light

 

Sandra

 

When is the Last Time You Said, “I Love Myself?”

This is the image of a green chalkboard with writing that says, "I love myself"

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This question may sound silly – but think about it.  These are the words we most long to hear from others, and yet we rarely say them to ourselves. If we don’t feel comfortable saying this to ourselves, how can we expect to be comfortable in accepting this message from others?  What is even more interesting is that the majority of us have actually never said, “I love myself.”

 

I recently led a spiritual workshop where the topic was about our creative infinite potential as human beings.  Through my extensive journey of personal healing, as well as many years of facilitating energy healing sessions and spiritual workshops, I have come to understand that the only way we can even begin to comprehend the vastness of our infinite potential is to start with the fundamental principle of self-love.  For this reason, I suggested an exercise which involved pairing up. One person would say, “I love myself,” while the other one listened with complete attention, and then they reversed the roles of speaker and listener. Not only did I request that they repeat this mantra aloud to each other, I also suggested they affirm this statement about 25 times. At first, it was apparent that the suggestion to participate in this exercise seemed a little awkward for everyone.  Because of our social conditioning, their initial feeling was that it would be much more easy to say “I love you” to someone else than it was to say “I love myself.”

 

Nevertheless, this open-minded, spiritually attuned group was willing to give it a try. It began as a cumbersome exercise of people dutifully reciting “I love myself” to each other.  Because the words aligned with the truth of spirit, we could each feel that what began as a mind exercise quickly deepened into expressions of the heart as we continued to repeat this affirmation to each other. Within minutes, the room began to swell with echoes of “I love myself” coming from everywhere. What a beautiful sound! It became quite obvious to all of us that what had begun as an uncomfortable exercise had transformed into an experience of inspiration and truth.

 

 

Why does it feel so uncomfortable to affirm “I love myself?”

 

 

Most of us are taught from early on in our childhood years by parents, caregivers, teachers, culture, traditions, and religious teachings that it is selfish to love ourselves.  We carry these childhood beliefs into adulthood without even realizing it. In order to spiritually evolve, it is essential to understand that “self-love” is not the same as “selfish.”

 

 

What is the difference between “self-love” and “selfish?”

 

 

Each one of us has been created by the energy of unconditional love.  As we remember this truth, we come to recognize that our natural state of being is LOVE.  When we choose to be loving and respectful of ourselves, our energy resonates with Universal Love and opens our hearts to a connection with our Higher Self.  This empowers us to access limitless energy for inspiration and regeneration from the Universe.  As a result, we have plenty of energy to express our love to others, resulting in generosity – not selfishness.

 

“Selfish,” on the other hand, is an emotion that centers predominantly on the needs and desires of self without consideration of others. Because it is self-centered, it focuses on ego and disconnects us from Creative Source.  Selfish behavior blocks universal love from flowing to and through us.  This results in looking to everyone else outside of ourselves to fulfill our needs and desires. Being around people who are acting selfish is typically a very draining experience.

 

 

Can simply affirming “I love myself”

really change how I feel about myself?

 

 

The simple answer is yes. Our feelings are the emotional barometer indicating whether our thoughts are aligned with our spiritual truth.  When we think kind and loving thoughts about ourselves, we are aligned with the spiritual truth of oneness and love, and we feel inspired and uplifted.  When we think unkind and judgmental thoughts about ourselves, we feel separated from our Creative Source and are bound to be living in fear.  It takes practice to change old habits. Practice this affirmation with a supportive friend or relative.  Another very effective way to affirm this new thought form is to stand before a mirror, look deeply into your own eyes, and say, “I love you.”  Louise Hay, famed spiritual coach and author, suggests you do this until you are moved to the point of tears.  It is then that you will know that you have embraced what you are saying to yourself with your heart.

 

 

Can I come to truly believe what I am saying?

 

 

Every belief we have is rooted in a repetitious thought pattern.  Because we have the power to choose our thoughts, we can consciously transform our outgrown beliefs of separation by changing our self-talk and the messages we convey to ourselves at any time in our lives. Our thoughts create the beliefs that form the foundation for how we live our lives. Our beliefs determine the words we speak, our words result in our actions, and our actions manifest our physical reality.

 

While it may seem very strange to you at first, persevere with affirming that you love and accept yourself.  To see yourself in the light of love is to embrace the truth of your True Self.  Since what we project is what we attract, you will also attract other people who love you for who you are.

 

Be kind to yourself!

 

Love and Light

 

Sandra

 

Remaining Centered During the Holidays

Beautiful women doing a yoga pose

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Now that Thanksgiving has just passed, most of us are feeling the accelerated pace of the world around us as we enter the official holiday season.  It is very easy to become overwhelmed with shopping, visiting family and friends, preparing large family meals, attending special holiday performances, and traveling.  This is the time of year where all the intense activity, in addition to the emotional highs and lows that accompany the holidays, can really take a toll on our health – mentally, emotionally, and physically.

 

In order to truly enjoy the holidays, it is essential to take time to regenerate yourself and to keep your energy balanced.  The following are some ways to remain centered in the midst of all the hustle and bustle:

 

1.  Stay in touch with your feelings – It is so easy to get carried away with all the outer stimulation that you can lose perspective on the signals you are getting from your mind and body.  Periodically check in with your feelings and honor your needs.  For example, if you feel tired, rest; if you feel overwhelmed, slow down the pace; if you feel sad, allow yourself to express your true feelings.

 

2.  Determine what matters most to you – Quite often, we are so busy reacting to the demands of the holidays that we lose sight of what we most want to experience.  Write down a list of the people whom you most want to see and the activities that you enjoy the most and make them a priority.  You may discover that there are quite a few activities that had already been scheduled that you actually prefer not to have on your list.

 

3. Have reasonable expectations – The main reason that people become discouraged and disappointed with the holidays is that they have unrealistic expectations that are not met.  Thinking that every member of your family is going to get along at the family reunion, that you are going to cook a perfect meal that pleases everyone, and that you are going to be on an emotional high throughout the holidays is bound to create disappointment.

 

4.  Focus on the simple pleasures – The most fulfilling experiences frequently do not cost a lot of money.  Taking a walk with a friend or relative, making cookies with children, playing games, reading by the fireside, and volunteering at a local charity are but a few of the experiences that nurture the heart with little or no demand on the pocketbook.

 

5.  Express gratitude – Being thankful opens your heart and creates the opportunities to being in the flow and to savoring the positive within everyone and everything that you are experiencing, however it unfolds.  Accept that every holiday is different and perfect in its own way.

 

6.  Breathe, breathe, breathe – We all have a tendency to “hold our breath” when we are busy and under stress.  Simply creating frequent times throughout the day to take some deep breaths is a great way to diffuse stress.

 

Most importantly, the true meaning of the holiday season is to remember our heart connection with others through the power of love.   By being kind to yourself and honoring your own needs, you create a balanced foundation from which to share your love with others in a peaceful way.

 

Love and Light,

 

Sandra

 

Living From the Inside Out

This is an image of words written in the form of clouds that say CORE VALUES

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We live in a physical world where there is a great emphasis on defining ourselves by title, power, money, and material possessions. This model of life is based on living from the outside in and centers around ego gratification, trying to control other people and outer circumstances, and material accumulation. If we are living from the outside in, we are likely to feel that we never have enough of anything and that no matter how successful we are, there is a sense of emptiness within our souls. It is not surprising that many of us have adopted this perception of life because it is based on the competitive, survival-oriented way of living which is the predominant model that has been demonstrated and taught to us by our parents, caregivers, and teachers.

 

 

As we expand in our spiritual evolution, most of us are seeking to realize a deeper purpose for our lives and are longing for a sense of inner peace. This requires that we reverse the center of our lives from the ego-based desires for outer approval and material gratification to centering our lives around our inner core values. In others words, we need to shift from living from the outside in to living from the inside out.

 

 

What Does Living From the Inside Out Mean?

 

 

Living from the inside out is a model of life which evolves from viewing the world from the Perspective of Oneness and is based on spiritual values and cooperating for the good of the whole. When you see the world from this vantage point, you remember that you are connected to the Source of Divine Love, as well as to everyone and everything. When you live from the inside-out, you are living in integrity, which is to say that you are integrating every aspect of your being – Soul, Mind, and Body – with the values of spiritual love.

 

 

Soul – Your soul is your connection to Spirit and becomes the center of your existence and the highest authority for how you choose to live your life. You access your spiritual wisdom by listening to your intuition and honoring your “gut level” feelings. Your self-worth is determined by your connection with Universal Love, not by how others perceive you.

 

Mind – You choose perceptions that are based on the qualities of Spirit: unconditional love, respect, cooperation; and you use your energy to create the quality of life you choose, rather than to fearfully react to others and your outer world of experience.

 

Body – Your body and material world align with your spiritual values and you create a physical reality that is in harmony with the values of your soul. Because you are reflecting your true self, you attract people and situations that resonate with your True Self.

 

 

Living in integrity from your spiritual core center incites motivation, passion, and inspiration because you are honoring your commitment to bring the gift of your Essential Self to the world. When you live from the inside out, you are living in harmony with the Oneness of Spirit, creating unity and harmony within your inner personal life, as well as the world all around you.

 

 

“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.” – Steve Jobs

 

 

Do you have any insights that you would like to share with us regarding how you have learned to live from the inside out?

 

Love and Light,

 

Sandra

 

For more information on Living From the Inside Out, order the book, “The Power of Oneness, Live The Life You Choose.”

 

 

Natural Disasters Remind Us That We Are All One

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The super typhoon, Haiyan, that roared through the Philippines last week is one of the most powerful storms recorded in history. At least 10,000 people have been killed and about 70 to 80 percent of everything in its path was swept away.

When nature unleashes its phenomenal powers, we are compelled to take notice.  It is times like these that we become acutely aware that we are all part of one human family, and that we are being called upon to come together to support each other and to bring balance to our earth in any way that we can. 

 

 
Regardless of our race, nationality, sex, creed, age, or socioeconomic status, we are one human family interdependent and interconnected with each other and with all the elements of nature.  Although we are each different in appearance and expression, we walk the earth together and share the same sun, moon, stars, oceans, and sky with each other, as well as with the animals, flowers, trees, grass, and rocks.  The way we take care of our planet is the way it takes care of us.  When any part of our ecosystem is out of balance, we become individually and collectively imbalanced.  When an animal, plant, or mineral becomes depleted, we have also lost a part of ourselves.  Like a circle of dominos, what affects any one of us automatically impacts every one of us. 

 

 
Natural disasters, such as typhoons, tsunamis, earthquakes, hurricanes, and tornadoes are all indications that our beloved Earth is seeking to balance itself.  Water is traditionally a symbol of emotion.  Since nothing is separated, when the waters of the earth create destruction and seem out of control, it is possibly a mirror image of humanity’s emotions also being destructive and out of control. Because we are a part of the earth, and the earth is part of who we are, every person has the power to contribute to the healing of our planet through the energy of divine unconditional love. Through prayer, we have the collective creative power to transform our earth. 

 

 

I invite you to say this prayer every day and to share it with many others. It will change your life; and in so doing, you will contribute to the healing of the world at large. Breathe in deeply, express each word slowly and with intention, imagine the beauty of a world of Oneness, and feel it in your heart as though it is already manifest.  Our thoughts create our reality, so one can only imagine the infinite transformational energy that can be generated by the majority of our world population uniting with each other in this vision prayer for global healing.

 

 


A Vision of Oneness

 

I am at one with the Source of Universal Light and the Ultimate Expression of Universal Love.


I am an open, active channel receiving and expressing unconditional love.

 

I am thankful for all that is. 

 

I am joyfully experiencing peace within, health at all levels of my being, and abundance in all forms that are in my greatest good.
 
I see my personal healing contributing to a
World of Unconditional Love, Harmony, Wholeness, Abundance, and Joy.
 

 
I surrender this vision to the unconditional love of the Universe. 

 

 

I know this prayer is answered in ways that are for the

greatest good of all.

 
(Excerpt from “The Power of Oneness, Live the Life You Choose”,
By Sandra Brossman) 

 

Love and Light,
Sandra

 

 

For more information on how you can help to heal disasters and tragedies, you may find it helpful to access a former blog, What Can I Do To Help Heal the Disasters and Tragedies Within the World. 

 

For more information on healing your life, order the book, The Power of Oneness, Live the Life You Choose.

 

 

The Person You Most Want To Be Is Who You Already Are

Text of the word Beautiful with YOU highlighted

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Do you ever find yourself using other people as a point of reference for establishing your identity?  For assessing your value as a person?  For measuring your level of accomplishments? 

 

 

 
Most of us do this at one time or another, and perhaps even most of the time.  Looking around and comparing yourself to others ultimately results in a game of self-judgment. You may decide that someone else is more beautiful, thinner, more important, healthier, more successful, wealthier, happier, and more powerful than you are. Of course, this may be true; but it is completely futile and irrelevant because the person you most want to be is who you already are!  We all have special gifts, and the whole point to your life is to explore the many facets of yourself.

 

 

 
This essential point became very apparent to me when I was recently attending a numerology course.  I use the example of numerology because numbers are objective.  Also, it is a widely accepted scientific and metaphysical premise that everything and everyone is a vibration of energy, and vibrations are numbers.  What is so beautiful about perceiving people through the lens of numerology is that it made me realize that everyone, in all the world, is special. We each have a particular name and a specific time that we are born to this world. 

 

 

 
These very personal factors have an enormous impact on your soul’s mission, how you think, your personality, and your life lessons. This is so amazing!  There is no “right” or “wrong” way to be who you are!  In fact, YOU are the ONLY person who can be the expression of your soul.  We were all born in the energy of unconditional love, and you are here to be the exquisitely unique expression of the energy you were destined to bring to this lifetime.  Your life purpose, the color of your eyes and hair, the shape of your body, your brain, your emotions, your talents, the people whom you attract into your world of experience, as well as how you experience life, are all expressions of the very special version of who you were born to be. Even your challenges in life have been designed by the Universe to keep you on track with becoming more Whole.  For example, if your soul’s mission in this lifetime is to become more open to change, you may find that you are presented with many situations that require you to be very flexible and willing to grow.  

 

 

 
Who you are is not determined by how you compare to other people.  Your True Self is the remembrance that you originated from the energy of Universal Love.  Because love is creative, it is expressed in many ways.  Each one of us has an innate talent and predominant gift to offer, whether it is in “loud” or “quiet” ways.  Your mission could be to be a peacemaker, to be of service to humanity, to create the foundation from which to build new ideas and forms, to be musical and artistic, to be a pillar of love for family and humanity, to be adventuresome, to bring revolutionary ideas into being, to be a messenger who brings the light of spiritual truth to the world, or all of these and even more!

 

 

One of the most effective ways you can live in your truth is to consciously align the decisions of your mind with the spiritual values of your heart. Follow your intuition and accept how the gift of your presence naturally unfolds every moment of every day by having the courage to be yourself. You are not here to win a popularity vote! Contrary to our inclination to think that we are “not enough,” there is nothing you need to add to make yourself more of your True Self. Spiritual healing is simply a matter of shedding the many layers of fear that you have used to cover up the perfection of your core being.

 

 

 
It reminds me of what Michelangelo said when he was asked to explain how he was guided to sculpt
the “Pieta”:

 

 

 

“I saw the angel in the marble and carved until I set him free.”

 

Love and Light,

 

Sandra

 

Free Yourself From the Worry Habit

This is an image of a person stretching their arms welcoming the day as the sun rises

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It seems everywhere we turn, people are worrying. Worrying is part of our human emotional makeup, and there are some conditions and situations where it can serve as a constructive emotion. Such as, motivating you to honor a commitment, meet a deadline, or avoid a dangerous situation.

 

 

Worry becomes extremely stressful and destructive when it gets to be a habit.  You can recognize that worrying is becoming a habit when you find yourself approaching most of the situations in your life from a fearful perspective. Chronic worrying can drain your energy, cause constant anxiety, paralyze your ability to make decisions, keep you up late at night, and can even make you sick.

 

 

Why do we worry? 

 

 

We worry because we are afraid, but afraid of what? Generally speaking our greatest fear is of the unknown. Usually, it isn’t the actual situations we experience that cause us to feel frightened nearly so much as our fearful anticipation of worse-case scenarios.

 

 

Interestingly, if you have adopted worrying as your usual approach to life, not only will you fearfully anticipate negative outcomes – you will also stress about potential positive outcomes. The things we worry about are only limited by our imagination: Fear of the lack of money, and fear of the responsibility that comes with financial success; fear of not being loved, and fear of the vulnerability of loving another; fear of losing a job and fear of staying stuck in a job, and the list goes on and on. You may even convince yourself that worrying is a good thing and that it helps you to solve problems and to prepare for the worst.  The problem with this theory is that whatever we focus on creates our reality; thus the saying, Worrying is praying for what you don’t want.  Recognizing this helps you to be aware that worrying is the problem, not the solution.

 

 

Worrying is a habit that can be healed. 

 

 

You can train your brain to manage stress in a more healthy way.  The following are some questions to ask yourself when you find your energy sinking into dreadful anticipation:

 

What am I thinking right now?  Awareness is the beginning of all healing. You are likely to be surprised at how many times you catch yourself focusing on negative outcomes.

 

What words am I using to communicate?  When you are listening to your own words, do you feel inspired by what you are saying, or do the words you are speaking make you want to crawl under the covers?

 

Am I in present time?  If you are a chronic worrier, you are spending most of your energy focusing on the future.  When you realize this, simply affirm, “I choose to be in present time.”

 

What am I worried about?  Sometimes actually making a list of things you are worried about helps to clear your mind so that you do not keep recycling different versions of the same issues.

 

You may even want to schedule a brief period of time every day to give attention to the things you have on your list of concerns.  Embrace your feelings, and give yourself permission to worry about anything you want during this period of time. The important thing is to give this worry period a specific time frame – the rest of the day is in the worry-free zone.

 

Is this a problem that I can solve?  You will most likely discover that many of the things you are worried about are not in your control because they are someone else’s lessons, and not something you can “fix.” On the other hand, if there IS something you can do,  be sure to get the problem out of your head and take action on your own ideas.

 

Can I change my perspective?  If you cannot actually solve the problem, you can always change your perception of the issue. In other words, if you have done all you know to do, it is very emotionally healthy to accept what you cannot change. Connecting with a higher spiritual power through prayer and meditation is the most powerful way to let go of our attachment as to how our ego wants something to be solved.

 

 

Asking yourself the above questions is a process that takes patience and practice.   Be gentle with yourself.  In time, you will most likely discover that this exercise will transform your worry habit into a much more loving and effective way to help yourself and others.

 

Love and Light,

 

Sandra

 

Are You Feeling Pushed to the Edge of Your Comfort Zone?

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Are you are feeling anxious about the future? Does time seem to be moving forward at lightening speed? Is it getting increasingly difficult to hold onto the familiar? If you have answered, “yes” to any of these questions, you have a lot of company.  

 

 

What is going on? 

 

 

 

On a logical level, we can say that the acceleration of time and change is due to the fact that technology has permeated every aspect of our lives.  It feels like what we accomplished within an hour last year is presently compressed into a minute. So, indeed, time really does appear to be moving more quickly! Yet, there is something much larger going on that transcends our linear physical world.  Most of us are sensing a massive shift that is connected with the infinitely larger metaphysical world of spirituality.  We are all in a stage of our human spiritual growth where we are compelled to awaken to beliefs and perceptions that we have been holding on to that no longer serve us well.  Try as we might, it feels like we just cannot hold onto to the status quo anymore.  The more we progress on our journey of personal growth,  the more we will be confronted with opportunities to get out of our comfort zone.  

 

 

 

What is meant by “comfort zone?”

 

 

 

Your comfort zone is the area of your life where your current life skills allow you to navigate with relative ease.  For example, socializing with familiar people, maintaining a daily routine of activities, and adhering to a schedule of regular events.  

 

 

Why do we resist?

 

 

 

Most of us like to feel comfortable and have a human tendency to try to avoid putting ourselves into new and challenging situations.  The problem with this is that we don’t grow.  If you are not moving forward, you will eventually become stuck. Even though you may feel a little insecure about moving out of familiar spaces, it is really quite healthy to experience the discomfort that comes from growth.  Discomfort is caused by bumping against the boundaries of our outgrown paradigms, indicating that it is time for our mind’s knowledge to catch up with our soul’s wisdom.  When we feel painfully uncomfortable, it is usually not because we are experiencing change, but because we are resisting it. 

 

 

 

Being on the edge of your comfort zone is really a healthy thing because it means that the Universe is inviting you to open up to new possibilities.  While you may be facing the need to make some major changes, it does not have to be frightening.  

 

 

The following are some practical suggestions for easing out of your comfort zone:   

 

 

 

1.  Change something in your daily routine – This could be something as simple as primarily using your non-dominant hand for the day or changing the route you typically take to drive to work or school.

 

 

2.  Take a class in something that is unusual – If you are a predominant left-brain thinker, take a class in painting or dancing.  If you are predominantly a right-brain thinker, you may consider a class to develop your computer skills. 

 

 

3.  Socialize with new people – Be open to bringing new people into your circle of friends. They are likely to bring fresh perspectives into your life and see you in a new light.

 

 

4.   Commit to doing something you have avoided – Many times we procrastinate doing something new because we are judging ourselves too harshly.  If you have avoided taking that exercise class, make it a priority.  If you have always wanted to speak in front of a group of people, find a small group that coincides with your interests and make a presentation.

 

 

5.  Break down a large goal into manageable steps – What appears to be an impossible goal can become much more motivating when we bring it down into a list of actionable tasks.  

 

 

6.  Travel to new places – Being open to new sights and cultures is a wonderful way to broaden our perspectives.  If traveling is beyond your budget, try taking a tour of where you presently live through the eyes of a visitor.  It is amazing how we become immune to all the opportunities that exist within the areas in which we live. 

 

 

 

Take a deep breath and begin to practice the habit of accepting the fact that change is a wonderful part of being alive!  Being on the edge of your comfort zone indicates that you are becoming more of who you are and that you are on the brink of experiencing a larger version of life.  Many times the most difficult times come right before you are about to make a major break through.  

 

 

 

Chuck Yeager, the first test pilot ever to fly faster than the speed of sound, expressed this so simply when responding to a journalist who asked him to explain his amazing experience.  He responded:

 

 

 

“Just before you break the sound barrier, the cockpit shakes the most!”

 

 

 

Are you on the edge of your comfort zone?  I welcome your insights!

 

 

 

Love and Light,

 

 

Sandra

 

The Joy of Spring – A Time For Change and New Beginnings

©MitarArt/shutterstock

 

 

Spring is a glorious time of rebirth and renewal. The fact that all of nature is always in the process of transformation is most apparent in spring.

 

Everywhere we turn we see evidence of the cycle of new beginnings. The earth thaws and becomes soft again, giving way to the emergence of new growth. The latent force within seeds awakens, allowing buds and blossoms to slowly appear and then explode into new life. The rhythm of the seasons demonstrates to us that the life force of creation is constant change and growth.

 

So it is with our own energy in spring. The seasonal surge moves into and through us, creating the impetus to make a fresh start. It is a perfect time to renew ourselves and break out of our old “earth patterns” to reach higher levels of consciousness. So how do we do this?

 

We can only change ourselves

 

First, and most importantly, we need to remember that the only person we have the power to change is ourselves. In the words of Mahatma Gandhi, “We need to BE the change we want to see.” Change is something we tend to want everyone else to do. When we avoid taking responsibility for changing ourselves, we are placing virtually everyone else in charge of our lives, which is many times the very thing we fear the most.

 

“Spring” is not just a noun – it is also a verb. 

 

Second, I encourage you to embrace the full meaning of “spring.” It is not just a noun – it is also a verb, meaning to leap forward over obstacles. So what is our greatest obstacle in moving forward? As usual, it is fear, but fear of what? Generally our greatest fear is that of the unknown. Or to put it another way, most of us are afraid of change. This is, indeed, a real “catch 22” because change and growth are qualities that are inherent to the energy of life. Change is inevitable, but how we choose to experience it is a choice! We can accept it or we can resist it.

 

Since what we resist persists, one of the most effective ways I know to open up to change is to become conscious of what we are resisting.  Once we become aware of why we are resisting change, we have the power to transcend our perceptions of fear and open our minds to the natural flow of change.

 

Following are some of the rationalizations we use to resist change:

 

We want to feel safe: We need to ask ourselves, safe from what? Are we really safe when we cling to the familiar? It is our spiritual nature to be the expression of perpetual growth and expansion. If we accept change, we can move forward in harmony with the flow of life. If we resist it, we are bound to experience tremendous difficulties. Resisting change keeps us locked into mental, emotional, and physical patterns based on the past. The safest place to be is in present time, which frees us to create healthy, new perceptions.

 

We don’t have the courage or strength: Courage (root word cuer, meaning heart) does not mean the absence of fear. Indeed, we all have fears. Having courage means we have the heart to face our fears and to make changes for the better, even when we are afraid. Does it take strength to make changes? Of course it does, but it takes a lot more of our strength to withstand the turmoil of going against the natural current of change. If we think about the times our strength has felt most depleted, has it been when we used our energy to adjust to new challenges, or when we desperately tried to stay in the same space?

 

We want to be comfortable: If we are not moving forward, we eventually become stuck in the status quo. Is it comfortable to feel stuck? Even though we may feel a little insecure about moving out of familiar spaces, it is really quite healthy to experience the discomfort that comes from growth. Discomfort is caused by bumping up against the boundaries we have outgrown, indicating that this is time for our mind’s knowledge to catch up with our soul’s wisdom. When we feel the world around us is beginning to close in, we can’t resolve the situation by making ourselves smaller; however, we can choose to create more expansive perspectives.

 

We don’t want to experience confusion: Change does cause confusion, and what a blessing it is for us! Confusion scrambles the fixated thought patterns we have locked into so that we can rearrange them into a new system of ideas. If we think about it, the most wonderful events in our lives, such as moving to a new house, receiving a promotion, getting married, or having a baby, all create a temporary state of chaos. Eventually things quiet down, but as we look around, we see that we are in an entirely new space.

 

We want to avoid pain: In our attempt to avoid the pain of change, we many times hold on to the past. Ironically, the parts of the past to which we remain most attached are the very ones that typically elicit the most painful memories. For example, the parent who abandoned us, the spouse who was unfaithful, the employer who cheated us, and the friend who betrayed us. Holding on to these types of memories frequently breeds self-defeating feelings of guilt and unworthiness that fuel the illusion that we are imprisoned in a life with no choices. Most of the pain we experience in our lives does not come from moving forward. It comes from holding ourselves back.

 

If you resonate with any of the above rationalizations to avoid change, simply forgive yourself – it is time to move on!  The good news is that when we shed the light of awareness on the illusion of these self-limiting rationalizations, we free ourselves to accept change and to make new choices.  This allows you to greet life with fluidity and to see life as a process of growth. We all have the capacity to spring into action to embrace the joy of change.  Welcome new beginnings!

 

 

 

I welcome you to share any insights or experiences you would like to offer that would encourage others to embrace their process of change.

 

Love and Light,

 

Sandra